One dog sleeps to my left side, his mouth curls from time to time. I wonder if it is a nightmare he is having, but I hope it is a dream. I sit on my mattress, wrapped in blue, cartoonish porcupine patterned sheets, my pillows supporting my back. My other dog sits on the floor, one ear flopped back. In the time it took to compose that sentence, he has now jumped up onto the bed and curled at my feet.
This is how I start this blog. This is the moment.
It is a typical night for me. A glass of wine on the nightstand. Two dogs in the bed, one medium-sized and fawn colored, the other, gray and white and once a stray.
I am learning to inhabit the other rooms of my house outside of the bedroom. A conscious effort I unconsciously chose to do as the temperatures dance upon the literal freeze point. My living room has cathedral ceilings with what I imagine would be a cathedral draft, a misplaced thermostat fighting to control an uncontrollable room, left defeated with a quiet chill.
So here I sit. My bedroom, this quiet, warm, and current sanctuary.
Here goes a blog. Another one.
How I Got Here
I ruminated on starting this for, hashtagnofilter, years. I had a concept in mind, finally made the plunge and bought the domain name, and then by an unfortunately fortunate moment, forgot a word in the domain name, misfired, and came across someone else’s blog who had made the leap with an almost exact name.
Example: my hypothetical idea was thepeanutbutter dot com, and then I accidentally typed in peanut butter dot com and thar she blows. That’s how close the names were. The difference between a “the” and a lack thereof. I knew I couldn’t go forward with it. I had to kill a darling that I had spoken out loud, that I had working titled for literally years, which for me, is a major commitment.
It was a life lesson of the hardest kind. I will I, won’t I, worth it, or waste of timed my way out of that concept. And I cannot let that happen again. Whether it comes to blogs, or creative writing, experiences or other opportunities, I can’t WIWIWIWOT [weeweeweewhat] something again. I can’t do it anymore.
My original motivation for starting this blog was to have a place to discuss some of the new experiences in my life candidly. I recently bought a home and got married. I moved to a new place that is more outside of my comfort zone than I could have anticipated. I changed career paths. Now, I have just entered a new decade, celebrating the big 3-0.
I wasn’t sure how to articulate all of that into a name for a blog. I thought a lot about what represented newness, growth, exploration, and transitions to me. I had a lot of bad ideas, and some decent ones, but I ultimately settled on the idea of molting.
Molting is the process that birds, insects, and many other creatures go through as they shed something, whether it be fur, feathers, or even a full layer of skin, to make way for new growth.
This past summer I spent more time than I should admit watching the bugs around my house at night. There are a lot of bugs. One day, a couple of cicadas decided to molt on my front porch’s columns. I watched them, visited them, and examined the molts they left behind.
Strangely, I envied the cicadas and the tangible past selves they discarded before moving on. I found myself thinking over and over again how nice it would be to see a molt of myself whenever I experienced significant spiritual or personal growth. Then, I could say to it, thank you for this period in my life, but this part of my life is done. I could show it to someone who hasn’t noticed my change, and say, look, I am not that person anymore!
The molting we do as humans is either invisible to the naked eye, or as subtle yet significant as a tectonic shift. My old selves are locked in loose hairs strewn about the house, swept up into a dust pan and disposed of.
Let’s Get Digital, Digital
I now invite you to begin the next phase in my newest molt with me. This is Digital Molt. This is my space to share things trivial and severe, places awe-inspiring and grotesque, and experiences real and surreal.
This blog is for you if you like being a decent person, travel, art, history, fashion, food, drinks, parties, design, animals, writing, and the environment. If you are looking for a blog with good writing, hearty sarcasm, and a confabulation of realism and fantasy, then pull up a chair.
Please be sure to follow me @DigitalMolt on Instagram, Twitter, Pinterest, and Facebook! I am just getting started!